expertwinSH's sbemail206
by expertwinSH
Summary: Strong Bad has changed. He is accepting of his brother Strong Sad, walks outside to smell the air, and is all around a nice guy. This email will explain all the changes twice, or single your money back!
1. expertwinSH's Beginning

**Chapter 1**

It was just a typical Thursday when Strong Bad got up, the light shining down on his luchador mask face. Not looking forward to anything in particular, Strong Bad just got up from bed and propped up his backside.

"Oooof... yeah."

Strong Bad then greeted his big younger brother Strong Sad in an out-of-character way.

"Hello!" Strong Bad said happily. No face-punching, pace-funching, or anything.

"Hey!"

Then, Strong Bad simply went outside and smelled the breeze.

"Ah, that's the stuff."

Marzipan walked there. "Why, hi. Like the clean air!"

"Why of course, my dear Marzipan."

"Good, because I'm going to put out a bond measure."

Strong Bad sincerely replied, "I'd like that."

Strong Bad then walked over to the Concession Stand, where Bubs, Coach Z, and Homsar were standing.

"Nice day, Bubs, Coach Z, Homsar."

All three replied, "Why, yes it is!"

Strong Bad comment, "I'm glad I bought the speech surgery for Homsar and Z, Bubs."

Bubs then said, "And I'm glad you bought it!"

Strong Bad then walked over the KoT's castle, to see the KoT and the Poopsmith. They both replied, "Hey!"

"Great to see I conviced you to break your vow of silence. Also, KoT, that diet working?"

"You bet! I'm not fat anymore."

Yes, clearly there is something wrong with Strong Bad.

He then went walked back to the House of the Brothers Strong.

"Hey, why don't I check the old Compé?"

He then went to, well, check the old Compé.

Strong Bad commented, "Ah, there's a bit of dust." More accurately, there was a lot of dust and several cobwebs.

"CLEAN THE COMPUTER!" Strong Mad yelled!

"Great idea!" Strong Bad sincerely replied.

Strong Bad sang, "I just love email..."

* * *

"Dear Strong Bad, what was the scariest experience you have ever experienced, Strong Bad? I want to know what kind of _scary_ experiences you have experienced, Strong Bad.

Your friend,

expertwinSH, GA, USA"

* * *

"Okay, I think I know how to answer that question twice." Nope, no fun-making-name-of or anything.

"Yay, twice!" replied Homestar, from behind the black.

Strong Bad replied, "Twice, indeed."

It all started when..."

It all started when Homestar went to see Strong Bad. He knocked on the door of the Brothers Strong.

"Go. Away." said Strong Bad.

"Aw come on."

"Look, I don't like you."

"Okay."

Strong Bad then strutted off to the computer room, only to find Homestar anything.

"Ho―Homestar?"

"Yep. Ho―Homestar. You fowgot I can bweak into youw house."

"Um, yeah. Now get lost!"

"Okay!" Homestar said without skipping a beat.

"When it comes to annoyances, Homestar had no _compe-titión_!" Strong Bad remarked behind Homestar's back.

Strong Bad then came outside to see two Homestars. When Strong Bad saw this, Homestar simply said, "I'm like that _Ha_-woo-hee guy."

Strong Bad then walked over to the Concession Stand.

"Hey there Bubs. Just came to see what to _not _buy."

Bubs was not amused. "At least I have an actual _job_." Coach Z added, "_Oooh_! He gort you."

Marzipan walked over. "Hello Bubs."

Strong Bad cracked, "Broke up with Homestar again?"

"Nope. This time _he_ broke up _with _me."

Coach Z replied, "I actually kinda warnt to see thot. Well, now that you're single―"

"Not in a million years."

Homsar replied, "_Ahhh_. _I broke my dyad_."

Strong Bad then just came back in.

"Okay, I think I know just what to do. I'll just turn him into a publicly humiliated fugitive without a girlfriend!"

Strong Sad remarked, "You already did that. _Strong Bad's Cool Game for Attractive People Episode 1: Homestar Ruiner_."

Strong Bad replied, "Yeah. I was the closest thing he had to a friend he had then. Poor guy."

Strong Bad simply kicked Strong Sad's guts. "Dumparees. Now go watch _Johnny Test _or those lame kiddie shows you like."

"I don't even like that show. _I _happen to like well-written and funny shows like _Animaniacs_."

"Right. Whatever."

Strong Bad went to his room and ruminated. "What if all that stuff that happened to Homestar happened to me...?"

**End of Chapter 1.**


	2. expertwinSH's Second Chapter

Strong Bad remained in his room, reading _Homestuck_ and listening to Limozeen. He then asked himself, "What is _Homestuck_ about?"

The Cheat replied, "Mehhh... mehhh... mehhh!"

After a few seconds, Strong Bad said, "Oh, yeah. I think I'm getting it. You know what, The Cheat? Let's go 'talk'—quote-unquote—to that little bug Strong Sad!" The Cheat let out an affirmative, "Meh meh!"

The Cheat and Strong Bad went in to room to, well, "talk" to Strong Sad. By which Strong Bad meant burning Strong Sad's pants—while we was still wearing it.

Strong Bad pulled out the famous BMW lighter, shook at at his swaying hips, and lit it. Strong Sad's pants lit, but for some reason, it didn't really burn. However, it _did_ let out a noxious gas that sent The Cheat and Strong Bad out of the room.

Strong Bad commented, "That was a waste of my own dang time."

The Cheat said, in an encouraging tone, "Mehh mehh mehh mehhhh!" To which Strong Bad replied, "I love that idea! We _should_ go mess with Homestar and Marzipan."

When the two went over to Marzipan and Homestar's house, he gave Homestar some "meatballs." Which were actually bombs.

Homestar said, "Thanks, but Marzipan wants me to be a vegan. Stupid New Yeaw's Wesolutions."

The bombs were about to explode in Strong Bad's hands, so Strong Bad dropped them.

The bombs exploded. Homestar said, "Hey! You destwoyed that ugly gnone thingy that I hated. I was going to get rid of it but I didn't want to tell Marzipan."

Marzipan walked there and whispered to Strong Bad, "Hey! You destroyed that horrible gnone statue. I was going to get rid of it but I didn't want to tell Homestar."

The Cheat walked away in anger.

Strong Bad simply walked out. He then walked over to Bubs' Concession Stand. Strong Bad gave him some "candy" from the whatsit pile.

Bubs scrutinized the "candy" and said, "Is that from the whatsit pile? The Poopsmith won't let me touch that. Thanks!"

Strong Bad simply walked away.

Strong Sad—whose pants were _now_ burning—then said to Strong Bad, "Hey! You cured my cold! Thanks!"

Strong Bad said, "You know you're on fire."

Strong Bad went back to the House of the Brothers Strong, confused.

**End of Chapter 2.**


	3. expertwinSH's Big Game

Strong Bad lay in his bed trying to wake up, to absolutely no avail. It took him about seventeen minutes to open his eyes, at which point, he decided to go outside.

"Hey, w... what are you guys doing."

Coach Z said, "We are having the Homsar Bowl."

"Homsar Bowl?"

"Yeah! We just started it last week. You see, we play this game called football, where we toss and kick a ball to get it to the opposite side of a field."

"I know what football is."

"Yeah. It's called the Homsar Bowl because Homsar is the ball!"

"Okay, that sounds pretty interesting! But who is the entertainment."

"DÖI!" 

"I quit the band quite a while ago, Coach."

"I knows that. The KOT will be eatin' bats."

Sardonically, Strong Bad bellowed, "Of course."

"The best part of it, Strong Bad, is that _you _are going to be in it."

"Sweet."

"Yeah. You are going to be on the _Little Stevie and the Evens_, playing against the _Even Stevens._"

"Okay."

Then, Strong Bad began to prepare. He did some exercising to perky exercise videos, gulped down some Total Load total body fitness energy substance, and made sure to be as muscular as he could. Which, frankly, was not that much.

Much later, the entire cast was at the game, watching Homsar getting beat up and thrown around.

At which point, Marzipan, the announcer, announced, "Attention: the losers of the First Annual Homsar Ball will be forced to watch the cartoon _Breadwinners_."

Strong Bad then kicked Homsar.

"And that gives the Evens 30 points!"

Homestar then talked Homsar.

"And the Even Stevens get 40 points!"

Strong Bad then punched Homsar.

Homestar called foul. "That is not how you play the game. Did you even read the rules?"

"Aw crap," said Strong Bad.

Marzipan said, "Looks like the Evens are disqualified."

Little Stevie and the Evens then watched _Breadwinners_.

Strong Bad said, "Hey. This is not half bad. Pretty good dubstep."

The Cheat then walked out of the room to get popcorn, and Strong Bad accidentally kicked him.

"Whoops!" said Strong Bad.

**End of Chapter 3.**


End file.
